Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Become The Person You Want

Some people who are shy when they were still kids sometimes failed to outgrow the shyness and brought it towards adulthood. Though this is not really a cause of concern, it can be worrisome since it can affect a person’s professional growth and poses huge social challenges. It hinders people from enjoying things or from easily doing things that they love.

Shyness is considered as a form of mild fear, and since it is mild, it does not really spoil the life of shy people. Sometimes, you feel shy and become a little bit fearsome when you are attending a very important meeting and you are about to present a crucial project. But once you feel at ease with the crowd and the environment, the fear and shyness would later go away.

Shy people would feel anxious when they are in a crowd. They don’t want to talk and are blushing, trembling, shaking or stammering. They avoid eye to eye contact and would often wish they will just disappear without a trace.

Some shy individuals avoid attending social gatherings thinking that they cannot blend with other people. They would always feel insecure of themselves and would think they will never become a perfect friend material. 

But chronic shyness can be treated, albeit slowly, since it cannot be erased in an instant. 

Think positive. Sometimes, shyness is aggravated by negative thoughts that is why it would help if shy people avoid thinking anything that can increase their insecurities or lower their self-esteem. If you keep on thinking that you cannot blend in with other people, how would you know if you will never try it? You don’t need to be a good conversationalist for you to blend in. You just need to listen and talk if needed. You don’t need to become the “master of ceremonies,” so to speak. Don’t ever think that other people would never like you as a friend if you have not really met them in person. Often times, your negative thoughts is what’s pinning you down, emotionally. 

Be yourself. When in a social gathering, stay calm and be yourself. Don’t pretend you know something when in fact, you don’t. Other people would like you just the way you are. 

Learn relaxation techniques. Shyness can also be caused by anxiety so it is best if you learn to do some relaxation techniques and apply them every time you feel anxious. There are books, videos, tapes, CDs and DVDs that you can use. 

You can learn proper deep breathing exercises which can help you stay calm and relaxed. 

Conquer your fear. Since shyness is considered as a form of mild fear, it would help if you know how to conquer your fear. What causes your fear? List them down, starting from the biggest contributing factor to the least one. Some shy people said they are afraid of something they do not really know. But in reality, there is something that triggers the fear so they really have to figure it out.

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